When I made that decision, to become a Referee,

I thought that my life would be filled with glee,
But, alas, after that whistle I did borrow,
my life, has been filled with grief and sorrow.

It seems, I just can’t make any call right,
Often I think, maybe it’s better I get on me bike!
First one team tells me, I missed this or that,
and after the games, no one ever comes over for a chat.

Then the other team says, “Ref! you must be blind!
Didn’t you see, he’s over the off-side line!”
Every Saturday, it’s the same old thing,
but to Rugby Park still I go, whenever they ring.

Then there are the people, on the touchline,
they look at me as if I’ve just committed a crime!
No one ever comes over to pat me on the back,
I think I’ll become a monk, go up a mountain, live in a shack.
Hideaway and just peer at the stars,
or maybe, I’ll just gun them all down! But then, I’d be behind bars!

So I carry on, behind a brave face.
Hopefully, God remembers me and grants me some Grace,
for all the abuse and harsh words in my direction.
He’ll ward off the devil’s jabs with a deflection,
Then, when I come upon the Pearly Gates
and St. Peter looks at me, demanding his rates,

I’ll just hold up me shiny Ref’s whistle
and quote some words from the Epistle.
With a wave, he’ll just let me straight in.
He’ll just laugh and say with a grin,
You’ve paid already, for all of your Sin!

Bryan Corlett

Author: Bryan Corlett

I am originally from Taranaki, a product of the Francis Douglas College 1st XV, I played Senior Rugby in Taranaki, then played in Australia for a few years.
I have been a part of the rebirth of Rugby in Malta, having been a Captain of a Malta XV, Club Coach, Refereed for 10 years, but now writing the weekly Rugby report for the Sunday newspapers.
I try to put a bit of humour into my write-ups. My wife is Maltese and we have four daughters.

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